My Dad's Tools Were My Toys

My dad worked for the phone company (New England Bell, part of Bell Telephone before the breakup) until the day he died. Tragically, he was only 46 at the time, and I was only 12, but that's a sad story for another time. The point I'm trying to make is that, as the guy that repairs phones and phone lines and things, my dad had lots of cool toys - he called them tools - close at hand.

What does that have to do with anything? I mean, all of his old tools must be antiques by now, right? Well, I'm glad you asked. Let me tell you a story....


We've been using cordless phones in my house for a while now - it's very convenient, as long as they don't get misplaced or all end up in the kitchen. Still, I've always kept a wall-mount hardwired phone in my man cave - you know, in case the power goes out, this phone should still work, since it's powered from the line.


Time passes. I couldn't tell you the last time I used the hardwired phone, but I can tell you when I found out something was wrong with it. I recently bought a Brother MFC-9340CDW color laser all-in-one (love it!!), which includes a FAX function. I'm not sure the last time I needed to FAX anything, but the capability was there, so why not set it up?


And so I did - and failed. I didn't get a dial tone. I checked my hardwired phone - no dial tone there, either. I checked the jack near my computer - again, no dial tone. Hmmm. We had a good connection coming into the house, otherwise the cordless phones wouldn't work. So somewhere between the cordless base station and the basement phone junction there was a problem. I needed a way to trace it.


I could have turned my hardwired phone into a test set with a phone jack, some wire, and a couple of alligator clips. I could have, but I didn't. It would have been a cheap solution, but awkward to handle. Instead, I looked around for a Lineman's Butt Test Set (really, that's what they're called - I couldn't make this stuff up!) like my dad used to use.


I found them easily enough. Staples will sell you a TS30 (a relatively low-end model but perfectly adequate for my needs) for $239. Pretty expensive - I'm glad they didn't carry them in-store, or I might have been tempted to buy one.

Fortunately, such an item is available online only. Home Depot has an even lower-end unit for $105 - but again, available online only.

Well, if I have to order it online, why not check out a wider range of options, right? So I checked eBay...

Wow!!

I found options alright, everything from a cheap $6 import to a high-end $800 model whose functions I could never even fathom, let alone use. I ended up with this, for a whopping $6.47 (plus free shipping from Hong Kong, I think).

It should be perfectly adequate for my needs - but if that were the end of the story, I would have never written any of this. No, while searching for a decent test set, I ran across this beauty, a vintage Western Electric Lineman's Rotary Phone Butt Test Set:

That's my dad's test set! Sure, maybe not the exact one he used, but close enough that it brought memories to my mind and a lump to my throat. How much did this little piece of my past cost to acquire? Just $32 and some change (including shipping). Needless to say, I bought it in a heartbeat! It even arrived a day earlier than expected, and now it hangs from a hook right near the desk in my man cave. I don't even know - or care - if it works. It's just a small reminder of my dad, and maybe something only a geek would love, but there  you have it.


I have to say, I'm also very lucky that my wife, Tammy, is so understanding of my sentimental foibles. Sure, she rolled her eyes when I came home with old U.S. Navy Rescue Beacon, and I still haven't told her about the surplus Civil Defense Geiger Counter, but she didn't bat an eyelash when I unboxed this item and told her why I bought it. She never had the chance to meet my dad, but she understands just the same.